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If Italy win the FIFA world cup in 2018, Rahul Gandhi will become the PM in 2019

Since Rahul Gandhi claimed that he was the first one to visit an ailing AB Vajpayee, I thought that this was the best time to analyze whether Rahul could come first in the Lok Sabha Elections in 2019.

First things first; Rahul was the first party vice-president to tear up and throw away the ordinance which was a major embarrassment to the then Prime Minister Manmohan Singh.

Rahul was also the first politician to hurl decorative expletives such as ‘Khoon ki Dalali’ at the incumbent Prime Minister.

Rahul has many ‘famous firsts’ to his name. He may be the first party president who has no idea about the NCC. He claims that his party spreads the message of love (something which the innocent Sikhs witnessed in 1984 after Indira Gandhi’s assassination). He is also one of the first few politicians to have created and circulated the fake narrative of ‘saffron terror’. He was also the first politician who was found celebrating, even when the nation was mourning with grief after the 26/11 attacks.

He is also the first party president who can’t speak extempore for even 15 seconds. Some wise man said that you can learn something from every human and from Rahul we can learn the art of being confident (even when you know nothing). Rahul’s meritorious list doesn’t end here. Raga has never taken responsibility for successive electoral losses. He is the first party president who takes responsibility only for electoral victories (which happen like once in 1, 50,000 years).

Rahul also sports torn kurtas, but on ‘off days’ he can be seen donning jackets worth 70 grand or more (another first). I believe that Rahul has an obsession with coming first. To digress a bit from the core issue, let me remind some of my football loving friends that the football world cup begins in some time. I want to draw a clear analogy before I conclude. If Italy win the soccer world cup this year, Rahul Gandhi will become the Prime Minister in 2019.

Italy for the first time in 60 years have failed to qualify for the world cup. Dreams keep you alive, so I have no problems with Raga’s ‘gaga land’. As I sign off, let Raga contemplate on two of his first fears: Dr Subramanian Swamy and Shehzad Poonawala (one outside his party and one within the party). For those who are confused about 2019, let me sum it up for you. You’ve got to choose between a winner and a whiner.

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About Alok Shetty

Alok Shetty
Alok Shetty writes slogans and taglines . He admires everything in the interest of the nation.

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  1. Italy runs in RaGa’s blood 😁
    Thumbs up for Alok Shetty

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